he smells like gasoline and big league chew
and if you were completely honest
a little (ok a lot) bit like sweat and dirt
but that’s understandable considering
it’s 98 degrees in august and both you and your brother
feel like crawling out of your skin

you’ve spent the last week sprawled half-naked
on the floor in your motel room
because it’s too hot to even lay on the furniture
(the pleather couches stick to your backs)
your brother’s fiddling with the cheap motel ac
jabbing at it with a screwdriver like he thinks it’s just been sleeping
and if he pokes it hard enough it’ll wake up
you’re zoned-out staring at the television
also motel-cheap and only gets 6 channels
but it’s saturday morning
and that’s when the good cartoons come on
you steal a glance up at your brother
try not to notice the rivulet of sweat making a path down his spine
and how that sweat would smell close-up
and maybe even what it tastes like
 
dean, that’s his name, glares down at you
panting and flushed and you realize you’ve been staring
“yeah just sit there and look pretty while i’m busting my ass over here”
he says, with a scowl, clearly exhausted
you both haven’t really slept in days, every time you get close
the unbearable heat catches up with you
feel like you’re roasting in a slow-cooker
so you just say fuck it and throw your covers to the floor
and stare up at the ceiling until you can hear birds chirping
 
dean climbs down from the little step ladder
and sits down cross-legged on the floor with you
“hey get me some water will ya?”
and you do, from the tap, because even the ice cubes melt in this kind of heat
he grabs the glass from you and gulps it down fast
spilling some down the sides of his mouth and onto his bare chest
you can see his adam’s apple bobbing in his throat
and your mouth dries up
 
he’s leaning back and closing his eyes
worn down, just like you, from the weeks of endless summer
and suddenly you’re in a heat-induced haze
leaning forward towards your brother
and your lips find his, plump and wet with a taste like salt
and he gasps into your mouth and it makes you hot
but not the normal kind of hot and it’s not half bad, you think

and then all at once he’s on top of you
your bodies sliding slow against each other
you feel something hard and you almost choke on your brother’s tongue
because you know what it is, you’re thirteen
but you’ve never felt one like this, up-close and personal
(well besides your own that is)
and so you shift your weight
until your brothers cock is pressed up against yours,
nothing but sweat-soaked denim between them
and you’re both sliding in some sick rhythm for who knows how long
breathing hard and heavy, and then dean makes this whimper
and you know that sound
you know it from all the nights of pretending to be asleep
while he jacks off in his bed, watching pay per view porn
dean opens his eyes and looks down at you
the sweat from his forehead is dripping into your eyes
so you can’t see anything but blurry rainbows
and he whispers “sam” and his dick is still on yours
out of nowhere you feel like you’ve been set on fire
your toes curl and your cock is pulsing white-hot
you’re rocking back and forth, body humming like a chainsaw

then it’s over and you’re breathing hard into your brother’s neck
but he breaks the touch and your arms fall limply at your sides
you feel carved out and hollow and as you hear his door close,
you find yourself shivering
wondering when it got so cold